Where did November go?

Life as I know it is going too fast. It's moments like this, when I realize it is already December 1st, that I start to freak out a little. On one hand, I am truly excited to get the first few weeks of December over with so I can go home for Christmas. On the other, I'm freaking out, because I feel like life is passing me by and I'm standing here not doing anything with it. Yes, work is going better and I'm keeping busy. Life at home still needs some improvement (i.e. I need motivation to clean the house when I get home at night, etc.) but things are generally going well. I'm reading too much into all of this, and I realize that... but at the same time, it's hard not to think about this when you wake up one day and realize that you are a 25 year old with an occasional 17 year old mentality. I don't want to grow up. On the other hand, I want to be a parent. I know I'm not ready for it yet, because I want to take a few more years and be selfish with my time, and Casey's... and I know it will be worth the wait when it happens. Sometimes I think that will be the moment when I finally 'grow up'. But it shouldn't be about that. I need to grow up before any of this can happen. I just don't know how.
I still want to go out and have fun with friends and do stupid things that I can look back on in a few years and think, "Wow, I was pretty stupid... but I had fun..." I don't want to have a kid and then regret not taking more time for myself to travel, and be selfish... I'm not ready to give that up yet. But will I continue to be selfish until I have children? I just hate hearing all of these stories on Oprah or where ever that talk about how women 'lose' themselves once they have kids. I don't even know who I am yet! I am getting a better idea, but I still can't find a definition. I want to create things. I honestly want to be a mascot- as stupid as that sounds- I want to run around in a costume and do silly things, and make little kids happy. I would honestly love that job, and although I'm sure it doesn't pay much, it would be an absolute blast! How many people do you know that want to be a mascot when they 'grow up'? Yeah... exactly. Anyway, I am just going to summarize all of these random thoughts and say that it's just part of the quarter-life crisis. Do we ever really know who we are? If life is changing all around us, then we should always be changing, in some ways, as well... it seems logical.
I just had a very important discussion with a professor in our department, and he's opened my eyes to a few things about life. I spent the last 30-45 minutes talking about life as a professor, and the struggles and triumphs that go into it. In general, it was one of those conversations that you look back at later on and think about it being a pivotal moment in life... not to sound extreme, but I can tell, even in the few minutes of silence I have had since the conversation, that it'll stick with me for awhile... maybe forever. Even more things to think about. (Sigh)... my brain is overloaded today, and not with the things it should be while I'm on the clock. Enough from me for one day... I realize I still haven't posted pictures from Thanksgiving yet... I promise to do that soon. That's all for now...